Another Openin', Another Show!

Opening night [the 27th] was WONDERFUL. I am so proud of everyone and what makes me even happier is how Tim told us how proud he is of us today. Way to start off the night, Tim Ryan. It's always wonderful to hear that from a director, especially Tim, especially when it's said so sincerely. Keep it up, On The Towners. It's a helluva show! [If you're not in the show, come see it! Monday is our dark day and we run until February 4th]. [Pronounce the first "r" in February...you're supposed to].

This is just a short blog because I am very tired.
And we have 2 shows tomorrow.
And I want to wake up and get a bubble tea.
Plus I have to drive my mom to the JCC.
Plus I have to go get makeup and hairspray before noon -
which is our call time.
Just in case you were curious.

Fallin'

Not gonna lie...I'm actually fucking exhausted. My feet hurt so much that I wish that they would fall off and die. And I'm in a bad mood ontop of it. All day I've been in a strange mood and I've tried to not let it get to me, but now that I'm home and relaxed, it's coming out in full force. It's just shitty that people take things out on each other....well, take things out on some people. Pretty shitty, and yet very understandable. It's not like I've never taken something out on someone before. It's just shitty to be the one who's taking it all. But, yet again, very understandable. What kind of friend are you if you don't let people be bitchy? It's human nature - you gotta let it flow. (Like going pee, really. Don't hold it in or you'll get an infected bladder. The same goes with bitching, only you'll get an "infected" state of mind rather than an infected bladder if you keep it inside). As long as the other person cares enough to confront you afterwards, that's all that matters. (Even if you're in a bitchy mood yourself and don't completely feel like hearing it at that point in time, it still makes all the difference. Haha). Getting back to the things that are shitty...it's shitty that I'm not normal all of the time because I hate making people worry when they don't need to and I did that earlier today. Idunno, I was just too tired to explain anything and I didn't know what I would be explaining even if I were to explain it. Explain. There I said it again. Just know that I'm always embraceable, even if I don't seem like it. For certain people, I always am. Nothing was wrong earlier today, I was just dreading the day to come I think. Well, dreading is pretty harsh - more like knowing how much work would have to be done today. There were some up sides to today for sure though - I got to help Janice when she was figuring out a new rhythm for one of the scene changes (being asked to play something for Janice on the piano so that I can help her out was an awesome compliment and SO much fun...not that I played it all that well at first, but I still helped!). Little moments were wonderful today too. But too much 'fighting' I think, even though it's always sarcastic. On the other hand, it's fun at times too.
Just actually so tired. So much pain. Need to sleep.


Love will keep us together.
Just in case you were curious.

The Circle Of Life

Emotions are flying right now. So are tempers. So are stresses. So are the smells from our stinky feet. (yes, we're back to that again). But, the important thing is to keep your mind focused...keep your eyes on the prize, if you will. This time, the prize is opening night of On The Town - after that, we'll be ok. I know that a lot of people are worried that we won't make it to opening night (by not make it, I mean that we won't be totally prepared). What can I tell these people? Trust the play. Trust your castmates. I think the latter is the most important of all. Even when we feel that we're carrying a show by ourselves, we aren't. We have our whole cast to support us, just as we are there to support them. If we believe and have faith in the team, then we will be alright. Look at how far we've come in less than 2 weeks. I know we don't have that much longer, but we can do it. We've done it before. We did Ragtime for God sake. Please believe in all of us. We can all do it. We're all going to help each other through this. It can be done. It will be done.



I try hard to stay controlled,
But I get carried away.
Just in case you were curious.

And Now, The End Is Near...

Back to the grindestone.
Back to politics.
Back to friends.
Back to hilarity.
Back to dance.
Back to work.
Back to working out.
Back to singing.
Back to stressing.
Back to acting.
Back to napping.
Back to knitting.
Back to cameras.
Back to pictures.
Back to videos.
Back to not knowing what to have for lunch.
Back to not knowing what to have for dinner.
Back to Starbucks.
Back to Subway.
Back to tears.
Back to heartbreak.
Back to gossip.
Back to the stage.
Back to nervousness.
Back to fights.
Back to drifting away.
Back to petty arguments.
Back to mooching.
Back to egos.
Back to inside jokes.
Back to anticipation.
Back to procrastination.
Back to lack of family time.
Back to complaints.
Back to the couches.
Back to exhaustion.
Back to joy.
Back to random.
Back to awkward.
Back to A.
Back to B.
Back to us.


Back for the last time.
Just in case you were curious.

Pickin' It Up But Then I Put It Back Down

So I'm pretty much obsessed with changing things on my blog now. First it was my picture from the Cheshire Cat to the HotHotHeat album cover. Now it's a flower and now I've deleted my pictures on the side. I want to put new ones there...ones from this year. I remembered what Dee did last year when we decided to change my colors around and I'm proud to say that I was able to do the same thing...with much trial and error.
I can't believe that I haven't done anything important for so long. I have a list of things to do...and I've only done a couple of them. So much for my "stop procrastinating, you lazy ass" resolution coming to fruition. Oh well, my driving is getting better, so I'm doing one thing on my list.
Maybe all of this change is my conscience telling me that it's a new year and I need to start afresh. I am, though; new things are starting up and I'm looking forward to them. I'm looking forward for the next few years, to tell you the truth, because I don't know what they hold for me. That's a scary statement, yet exciting. I'm excited to actually get a job this summer and earn some real money. I hope that I can do at least one show with Tim, whether it be in the Fringe or with Jane. Don't you sometimes hate it when people ask you what you're going to do next year? As in people who aren't in our program. It feels strange to say "Oh, audition as much as possible and cross my fingers" - quite often they just smile with an "Oh, good for you" kind of look in their eyes. It's odd. It feels different to not have a concrete answer like "I'm going to school" or "I have a great job all lined up"; instead, we're like tumbleweeds blowing in the wind. A wind that is made from a huge fan on stage right.
Tomorrow I am doing work - cabaret work and more line work. Jarmo's present is all ready and I'm extremely excited about it. I might make myself one.
It's rather early for me to go to bed, but as per usual, I have to give myself time to think.


All technology hates me.
My iPod nano (named Daisy) is being a bitch.
Not to mention the FM adapter.
Will nothing just WORK?
Stupid bitches.
Just in case you were curious.

Good Mornin', Good Mornin'!

Wow. I don't think it's all that great to stay up late...well THIS late...working on a blogger. As you may have noticed, some new colors are here. I'm a fan. And I'm very tired.

New Years resolutions?
1. Be a better driver.
2. Be a better friend.
3. Be a better Jew. (this doesn't really mean being more kosher, because I love bacon every once in a while...instead this means acting more like someone who loves their religion (which I do), rather than someone who is funny about their religion all the time). This one came up because I really want to go on The March of the Living in a few years and I would feel better going if I acted more adult about my religion. (the March of the Living was created to take Jews through the remains of the concentration camps).
4. Stop procrastinating, you lazy ass.
5. Work as hard as I KNOW that I can.
6. Make myself a priority more of the time. (Stop being a push-over).
7. Take care of myself. (Mentally, physically, emotionally).
8. Speak my mind.

Those are all that I can think of now. I'm sure there are more. All around, be a better, more stable person and be true to myself.


My spindle fingers are mighty cold.
Just in case you were curious.