Sometimes When I Get Tired, I Wanna Be Alone

Not gonna lie, I'm really not all that happy right now. I can hear the fireworks from downtown and I realized how I never get to see fireworks anymore...or I haven't seen them for a long time it feels like. How strange is that? The fact that I'm sitting here and missing fireworks tells me that I'm exhausted and in a weird mood and not really wanting to go out. But I am going out...to a Canada day party that happens every year and that is always a lot of fun...but I'm not in the mood for some reason. Maybe I just need to drink. I probably do. But I also think that I need to go to bed. Do you ever have that feeling where your eyes are so heavy and then your breathing starts to slow down and before you know it, your head is tilted really strangely at whatever you look at because you don't have the energy to lift it up again? That's where I am right now.
I think it's a combination of being tired and feeling really lonely. I mean, I have AMAZING friends, don't get me wrong...I absolutely love them to death...but I just wish that everyone was here. I wish that so much. It's strange that it's getting more difficult and not easier, considering it's 45 rather than 65. But it really is getting more painful. That's why I'm in this mood...I'm exhausted and missing one piece to my cutlery set.



Some days I need to change my world; one desire fills this empty void.
Sometimes when I get tired, I wanna be alone.
The days pass uninspired, I sleep like a stone...
Tonight I wanna be saved by you - I wanna be lost in you.
Not the same song, but a damn good one none the less.
Just in case you were curious.